“No, I’m not a damned talking bug!” it snarls in a sort of squeaking way. “I’m a fairy!”
“A fairy?” I comment in a dubious tone. “I thought fairies were always girls.”
“That’s dumb,” he responds. “Fairy babies have to come from somewhere.”
I peer at him for a few seconds. “Are you… pregnant?”
“No!” he shouts. “I’m just fat! Now get me off here before the bastard fish eat me! They’re gonna eat me!”
-excerpt from Red Crystal
Think of it as the traditional hero rescues the princess story. Except I wasn’t exactly a hero, and I don’t think anyone would call her a princess. More than that, I never actually rescued anyone. Other than those things, it was exactly the same.
-excerpt from Red Crystal: Dark Council
Taking a step forward, I jump back when an axe blade descends directly in front of me. I look to where Ant stands a few feet away. He’s shaking his head as though disappointed. That’s not new.
“What?” I get out, trying to keep the rush of terror from my voice. “I didn’t get chopped in half by your axe. That’s good, right? It shows I’m learning.”
“You should know by now that I expect better than that,” he claims. “You should have caught the axe before it landed, spun it around, and delivered it into the skull of the nearest demon!”
“There aren’t any demons around here,” I point out. Ant shrugs.
“Night would have been an acceptable alternative,” he advises me.
The blind elf wanders by, tripping over the axe and tumbling down the hill.
-excerpt from Red Crystal: Dark Master